Most of us know depression if we see a depressed mood for most of the day or for a few days. We can also identify depression if there is sadness or thoughts of suicide. There are other symptoms that go unnoticed or thought to be related to something else. These are other signs:
1. lost of appetite
2. lost interest in having fun
3. lost interest in sex
4. unplanned weight loss or weight gain
5. not being able to fall asleep or staying asleep
6. not wanting to get out of bed or too much sleep
7. feeling tired, worn out, low on energy, not wanting or able to do anything
8. feeling guilty
9. feeling like life is not worth living, feeling worthless
10. poor concentration, forgetfulness, unable to remember things
Sadly those around you will want you to snap out of it. They might not even take you seriously unless you mention you are suicidal. The reality is that all of these symptoms are serious and it can cripple a persons life.
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You bring up some good issues in this and your previous points, friend :) For example, why don't officers ask for help? Fear, not knowing where to go, and "getting too deep into the hole."
ReplyDeleteRemember, we're all taught to wear "masks" in LE and hide from the public--and from one another. We certainly don't want peers to know how we truly feel. In time we don't even know who we are ourselves. Our spouses are saying, "You aren't the same, any more." We become more and more isolated. We "man-up," we drink or do pain killers, we have affairs, whatever works.
The depression signs you mention, like the signs of suicide, are all good and well, but over 2/3 of police suicides are "a surprise." No one sees the signs. This is because we mask them so well.
The only answer will be when departments start to take mental health seriously and start teaching officers to take care of themselves, emotionally, long BEFORE they get into trouble, rather than waiting until they get there. In the meantime, until departments get off their butts, officers will have to do it themselves. That means taking care of their emotional health the same way they do their physical health, their teeth, and their prowess on the range.
It's a choice, but also a responsibility--at the same time you get a physical checkup, get a mental health checkup annually with a therapist. On your own. Doesn't have to be with an EAP if you don't want. But it's a choice. We don't have to do either. No one can force us. We can let things go and just die.
very good. if i start thinking back i can see that there were subtle signs from cops i crossed paths with. i felt guilty for a while because i thought i should have seen it coming. one example a cop i spoke with once in a blue moon. they considered him an empty suit...he was in the print car and lifted prints whenever we had burglaries and simple/no homicide type jobs. so most cops thought he did not carry his share of work and saw him as lazy and a non team player. he was not one of the boys. he displayed no feelings and saw the job as an 8X4. two days before he committed suicide i had the opportunity to speak with him while we waited on some paperwork. he was friendly as always but expressed no emotions, said life at home had changed, he was getting into debt and absolutely nothing good was going on in his life. its the way he said things and that look on his face as if he was already gone. two days later he went into the family room where his wife and kids were watching tv and put the gun to his head and shot himself. a second example is a rookie female officer who stood 5 foot even. no one wanted to work with her because they didn't feel she could do the job. she was also labled a do nothing since she was a house mouse (working inside the precinct). she wanted so bad to be on patrol so it wasn't her fault they kept her inside. when my partner took an emergency day i requested her to be my partner for the day. she poured her heart out and thought it was unfair. i had to agree with her in many points. i explained to her when i came in they were undermanned so i did not have to go through half of what she is going through. but i explained to her that when the next set of rookies came in she would have some seniority and things will change a little for her. weeks passed and she seem so depressed answering phones so i took a few minutes to talk to her and ask if she wanted anything for lunch. at that time she stated she was having boyfriend problems. that same night after work she met with him and put the gun to her head. ok maybe there is no obvious signs, your correct in saying cops don't talk about it and we all develop a superman syndrome. however if i remember correctly in a span of 3 years there was a spike in suicides in nycllike never before and the pattern to me was that they were cops who were not popular, empty suits, rats, etc. OR they were cops that were rougue and were facing department charges and/or criminal charges. Very few in my eyes commit suicide for the same reasons civilians do. the bottom line is that it is job related no matter how small it may seem to everyone else. when you identify yourself as a cop you are unable to lose that identity especially when you are under the threat of it being taken away from you. i was fortunate to meet great people who genuinely wanted to help me and my family literately dropped everything to help me along. had it not been for that i would not be writing to you today. at my time of severe depression laying on a bed in a mental institution felt so good i did not want to leave. and when i thought about eating a bullet it felt like that was what i should do.
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